The Uncanny truths about Motherhood- Embarrassment by your Children

It just goes with the territory. Once you have a child and they are talking and understanding life, they WILL embarrass you by things they say. It is a given. You will just have to accept it and come up with something nice to cover it up or walk away from the child and pretend he is not yours. That is what I wanted to do one day in Disneyland.
As we were standing in line to buy our tickets, there was a lady in front of us. She was in a velour jumpsuit, you know, the typical mom gear around here, “cozy outfit,” jacket and pants. (Though her jacket was kind of a little too short for her, imo.) My son turns around to me and says;
“Mom, that lady has a fat tummy like you do.”
Me: (totally embarrassed and not knowing what to say, I just didn’t say anything in hopes that it would stop him. It didn’t.
Him: Mom, look! That lady has a fat stomach like you! It’s all hanging out!
This is when I kneeled down to his level and said, “Booger, DON’T you say that. Shhhh! That is not nice.” {Standing back up again thinking he’s done and understands}
Him: Well she does, look! It hangs over her pants. Her tummy’s like yours.
I am horrified. I am wishing that time was NOT standing still and hoping that she’s not hearing any of this, but knowing better because my boogers are anything but quiet. I lean down again, and say
“Stop! No more, that is not nice.” I didn’t know what else to say. I wanted him to stop repeating himself as he got louder and louder every time that I ignored him.
Finally she left and it was our turn to go up to the window. After I got our passes and we were heading inside, I gave him the whole manners speech about not talking about others. That people have feelings and you can hurt people’s feelings saying these sort of things. At this point we had been taking showers together. He was about 2 ½-3 I can’t really remember, but this is when I knew that we would no longer be taking showers together. He didn’t need to see my fat tummy anymore. Nor did he need to tell others that theirs’ looked like mine. (Just FTR, I could care less if people know I have a fat tummy. My first booger was 9 lb 4 oz, and me being short-waisted, it’s a given what happened to my stomach. There was no more place for him to go. I'm not worried about me, I’m more worried about what he’s saying to others.)
So, when children come, prepare to be embarrassed. Maybe I am the only one out there that has such an honest, candid child. I hope I am not. Sometimes they say really funny things. Sometimes they are really sweet and pure. And then there are other times, times like these, when you want to crawl in a hole and pretend you are non-existent. I have labeled all of Bubba Boogers sayings as “Kid Quips”. If you have a minute or two and want to laugh, check them out. There's more to come often as it's a daily thing with this kid. He keeps life entertaining.